Mother of the Year Award

I mean really, I should be given the mother of the year award for many different instances in my life.

There was the time I let 2 year old Jordan ride in the front seat of my car without a seat belt (I mean, I was only in my residential neighborhood driving 15 mph) and while he was playing with the door handle he happened to unlatch the front door which swung open with him attached, hanging onto the said door handle for life as I drove down the road.

There was the time I almost let Kenzie drown in a hot  tub right next to me because I was busy  talking to family and didn't notice her little 3 year old self slip in.  I asked Jordan, "Where's Kenzie?" He replied, "She's drowning." I replied, "That's not funny Jordan.  Don't joke that way."  Only to find out she really WAS drowning and he saved her life.

Or, need I mention my son falling out of a two story window while I sat there folding laundry watching him lean on the screen?  Or when Riley ran out to a busy road and was picked up by a policeman (who didn't want to give him back by the way) when I had just turned around for 30 secs?  And don't forget Jake stealing for me putting his clothes in the car. http://www.motobees.blogspot.com/2013/12/trimming-tree-and-random-bits.html

Then there are the moments when you've just had it and you do things like say to your children, "Fine, if you're going to behave and eat like animals you can live outside like the animals." and you drag said children outside and lock every single door intending to leave them there over night. (It was a warm day outside.  Besides, they found their way back in within 30 minutes and I had cooled down by then.)

Can we all relate or am I the only one?

So, we've been preparing to move and moving this last week. Thursday was an especially stressful day for me.  It was the day we were to close and we still didn't know if the bank had wired the money to the title company or not.  It was the day the property management had called me in the morning to alert me that she had been over the day prior to inspect the lawn because some neighbor had reported that we had been driving on the lawn and ruining the sprinkler system and the landlord had called her frantic.  She wanted to let us know she could see we hadn't (duh!) and that said neighbor was spying on us.  It was the morning I was trying to arrange a moving truck for the weekend, transfer all my bills to my new address, contact the school to find out where the new bus stop was...you know, one of those busy mornings when I had a lot on my mind.  On those mornings I consider it a success when we get up at 6, get the children fed and get off to school fully dressed with lunches in hand.  And we did that day.

As I walked into the title company to sign all the final papers I received a phone call.  It went something like this:

Me: This is Chelsey.  How may I help you?  (I take call for the office when we're not in so that our patient's can reach us.)

Person on phone:  Hi Chelsey.  This is Ms. Romano.  Jacob's teacher.

Me:  Oh, hi Ms. Romano.

Ms. Romano:  I just wanted to let you know that your son, Jacob, brought a knife to school today.  A long serrated knife.

Me (horrified):  Oh.

Ms. Romano:  It was just to cut his grapefruit that he brought for his lunch.  He must cut his own grapefruits at home.

Me:  Yes, he does.  (I mean I let him pour his own milk and everything.  Responsibility, responsibility, responsibility says I or rather...I've got 5 kids and by the time you get to number 5 he does a lot more than you ever let number one do.)

Ms. Romano:  Well, that isn't really appropriate here and we let him know that it's not okay to bring a knife to school.

Me:  Oh yes.  You are totally right.  I'm so sorry that happened.

Ms. Romano:  I'm assuming Jacob also makes his own lunches?

Me (a little puzzled):  Yes, he does.

Ms. Romano:  Well, you may want to check those more often.  Today he only had an apple and a grapefruit in his lunch and I think he was a little hungry.

What could I say?  That I had Jacob on a cleanse diet that week?  The thought crossed my mind.

Me (embarrassed and sorry I didn't check his lunch that day when I usually do and fully chastised):  Yes, I should.  I'll do that more often.

So, to sum it all up:  Yep.  I'm the mom that sent my kindergartner to school with a knife.  I'm the mom with the starving child.

But then again I'm the mom that makes cool sledding jumps for my kids

'

and then when they crash and burn 

take a picture of them crying so I can post it on my blog. 

 

No, wait, that's their Dad who does that.