We all have parenting moments when we are ashamed of the way our children behave. We all have those moments because it does reflect on us. Could I have done something better? We're even more embarrassed when we ask ourselves if we would have reacted in the same way and the answer is...yes, probably. And then even more embarrassed when we realize we did act in the same way at the same time.
Wrestling is a fighting sport. Riley is a feisty kid...he likes to win and he doesn't like to lose. He also doesn't just let people walk all over him. Most of the time he shows no emotion on the mat. He is one of those technical wrestlers that sometimes is a little boring to watch. Not like Ben, Ben leaves it all out on the mat, but Ben and Riley are different people. Riley keeps it all buttoned up, until it's not. Kind of like someone else I know, me. So, when Riley feels likes someone deserves it, you better watch out.
Yes, he hit a kid in the face at a summer match. Yes, he refused to shake a kid's hand last year at the end of a match when the kid pushed his face in the mat when the ref wasn't looking at the end. I didn't see the first, but I did see the second and to be honest, I would have done the same thing. I mean, it's better than what he did to the first kid, isn't it? Better to not shake a hand than to hit him.
Again, I can understand this. I was SUPER aggressive and competitive on the court. I was the one to foul out all the time. And, the fouls weren't always accidents because I was playing aggressively. Sometimes I'd shove or give an elbow just because I felt the girl deserved it.
Wrestling is a fighting sport. It is so intense that as a parent I have had to learn to sit far away from the mat where other parents are because I just might get in a fight with the parent. I mean, ask my friends Tammy and Kay who were with me when I accidentally sat next to a parent of one of Ben's opponents at a regional tournament who after a barrage of him yelling and screaming at my kid as if he was the villain, I asked, when I had gotten so sick of the yelling, not so politely, to shut up. To which he replied that is my kid out there. To which I replied well, the other kid is mine and you don't see me making an ass of myself and yelling. To which he replied he would continue. To which I replied then sit away from me. I think my friends thought I was going to get into a fight. I didn't. I controlled myself, but I was 47, not 17.
Wrestling is a fighting sport and you can feel it in the air when something is about to pop. And when I walked into the tournament, Saturday morning, where Riley was about to wrestle one of the top wrestlers in Utah at a tournament, I felt that feeling. Parents asked me if I was aware who Riley was about to wrestle. They told me how poorly one of his teammates was treated by this wrestler and they told me that Riley was about to "teach that kid a lesson". Coaches told me about the upcoming match and how Riley was capable of beating the kid and could pay him back for the way he had treated his teammate. It was tense. To be honest, before I entered the gym, I was excited for the match. It was an important match and would show Riley's great skill if he won. You want matches like that. My excitement turned to tenseness after speaking with the parents.
The match started and kids and parents were seated on the ground near the mat. I sat by the opposing team's crowd. Mistake #1. Then, when the kids next to me were bragging about how much the other kid was going to pummel Riley, I politely informed them that it was my kid out there that he was wrestling and that hopefully it would be a good match. And then....the kids actually goaded me and asked me if my kid had placed at state three years in a row and told me that my kid was a nobody to which I tried not to reply but after several of their tauntings told the kids to shut the "explicit word" up please.
I watched the match and Riley did not have the calm of his usual matches. He wasn't controlling the pace he was letting the kid control him and I could see his frustration mounting. Soon, three was thirty seconds left in the match and something happens and Riley attempts to knee the kid in the face, pulling back at the last second.
Coaches tempered flared and I thought there was going to be a fight amongst the coaches. Parents were screaming, kids were screaming and Riley was kicked out of the tournament.
On his way out he was receiving conflicting messages. Parents that told him to "teach that kid a lesson" couldn't understand how Riley could be so violent. His coaches told him to get out of the gym and that they would deal with this outburst later. Other coaches from other teams came over and congratulated him for finally giving the kid what he deserved and me, I was in shock. He was my kid. I was his mom and I told high school kids to shut the """" up. I was no better.
As I made my way outside to find him, I overheard parents from the other team discussing that this must be how our coach teaches their kids. I had to say something and I did. That was my kid and the coach didn't teach him that or encourage that. The parent almost punched me.
I asked Riley what happened. He said that the wrestler was verbally taunting him the whole match and that he wasn't going to take it anymore. He didn't care if he got kicked out. The kid deserved it. I asked him what made him the deliverer of justice and why he felt he had to mete out that kid's punishment...on and on and on we talked, until finally, Riley saw what he had done wrong.
He wrote an apology letter to the athletic director and was suspended for two whole tournaments.
The most embarrassing thing was that the mother of his opponent posted the knee to the face on instagram with his name. I'm sure it's still out there.
And ya, my kid attempted to knee a kid in the face. I guess I'm not a perfect parent after all.
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