Sunday reflections 6/26/2011

While I'm mostly just a picture blogger, I've decided that every Sunday I should just take some time, reflect on the week, and update myself (for future purposes) on the lives and happenings in our home.  I'm going to call them my Sunday reflections and they're mostly for me and my memory because as I read my old journals(from my teenage years) I see my memories are definitely fading with time and there are so many things that I just don't want to forget.  Which makes me remember what I wanted to ask my fellow bloggers, do you know how to publish your blogs in a book format?  If you can, how do you do it and have you done it and how did it turn out? 
I've been reading again lately.  I say again because it seems as if I took a hiatus this last 6 months.  In the last week I've read:  Cheaper by the dozen, The Witch of Blackbird Pond, The sign of the Beaver and the The Trouble with Boys by Peg Tyre.  So the boy book, if you have a boy I strongly encourage you to read it.  I wish I had read it earlier, maybe some of the struggles I am having now with my oldest could have been averted if I had read this earlier.  I don't know that it really offers solutions, but I feel more aware of what I need to watch out for in regards to schooling and my boys and how I can encourage them more. 

Now, the Witch of Blackbird Pond and The sign of the Beaver were just books I read for fun.  They were easy reads and interesting looks back at what life was like in early colonial times.  In the sign of the Beaver, the father leaves his 13 year old son alone at their new homestead while he travels back to retrieve the rest of the family.  Having read this book, I am amazed at the responsibilities and trust placed upon the youth during those times.  I can not imagine my oldest shouldering the responsibilities that the young man in the story had to shoulder.  Of course, after having read these I gave them the stamp of approval for my two oldest children.  I'd much rather have them read historical fiction than the fantasy/magic novels that are so prevalent in our current times.  Not that I am against those books, I just feel it is good for them to see and learn how others lived historically.  I especially think they need to appreciate the sacrifices our forefathers made here in America to establish this nation. 

Finally, the last book I read was Cheaper by the dozen and I have to admit, while this book made me laugh and feel better about the chaotic state my house and family of seven can be, it also made me feel incredibly guilty.  These parents were amazing and seemed to never lose an opportunity to teach their children.  It made me see that children are so teachable and while I try to constantly teach my children, I really could do better. 

Our household this week has: 

• bought a basketball hoop (it's about time)  I've taught the children horse, next on my agenda is going to be bump
• joined a pool and swam several days this week
• gone out to eat three times for free from the summer reading program.  I think the kids enjoyed this the most.  They told me over and over how the reading was really worth it.  Of course, in my family, I am proud to say reading is not something I have to motivate my children to do.  In fact, it is the opposite, many times I have to tell them to put down their books and go outside to play, or practice their piano, do their math, write...etc, etc
• Jordan and Dad went out dirtbiking on Saturday together while the remaining four stayed home and played lego star wars, which Kenzie complained about because she didn't get to play karaoke revolution, but I noticed that she was playing just as much as her younger brother, so...no karaoke revolution, sorry!  She was pretty mad at me about that.  I guess I can't be the popular parent all the time:(
• Last, but not least, I rode the motorcyle trail that Brad made for the boys.  I have been terrified to try it because he did make it quite technical to help the boys improve their skills, but I had to show to my daughter that I could face and overcome my own fears and that she too could do the same.  You see, Kenzie has been afraid to ride the motorcyle here.  We started her on sand and anyone that has ever ridden a dirt bike in sand knows it is not the best terrain to learn on.  I've been trying to convince her that it is not nearly so bad to ride here and that she will like it, but until I did this, she did not want to attempt to ride AT ALL, no matter how much we tried to get her to do it.  Since then (Tuesday) Kenzie has ridden every day with the boys.  Way to be tough Kenz!

The kids have helped out with chores much better this week after the little mishap of last week.  I still look around the house and see things everywhere and wish that they more frequently picked up after themselves, but I think part of having a big family means having messy (not dirty) houses especially when all are home.  It is difficult to have all your children home all day, but I woudn't trade these summer days for anything.  I hope they always look back at their summers and remember not only the household chores they had to do, but the bonding family time of driving in the car to go to the pool or the library or out to get treats together.  I realize as they grow older and older that the time I have with them is really so brief...and then they are off on their own.

Although the chores have been better this week there are still the power struggles that I have with my children.  It is hard to know which battles to fight and which battles to let slide by.  It is hard to know when to correct a child harshly or when to just laugh at what they said and let it slide off my shoulders.  A few years ago, my parents and I were watching a video we had made for my older sister at college when I was about 16.  As I watched my younger self on video, I was not at all impressed with the sassiness I exhibited to my parents who were just trying to do something nice to help my homesick sister.  What a brat I could be!  Really.  And yet, I turned out okay and I wonder how many times my parents just said, "She is a good girl, we'll let that one slide."  They must have seen me as a good girl, as better than I was, because I turned out okay.  Which brings me to my last point of my long and lengthy blog dissertation: faith.

In Ether 12:6 it states, "...faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith."  I think this is a great scripture for parenting.  I know, as a parent, we can sometimes get discouraged at the choices our children make.  Nonetheless, I truly know that if we can keep that eye of faith with regards to our children and see them as God sees them and understand their true nature, those children will become what we see in them.  We, as parents, directly reflect an image to them (whether it is good or bad) and they will become what we see in them.  That is what made the parents in Cheaper by the dozen so great.  They understood the great learning potential each of their children had and they helped them, in any way they could, live up to that great potential.  Does that mean that the children who are struggling are struggling because their parents had no faith in them?  No, that is not what I am trying to say.  I do know when you have faith in your children and in their future they have greater faith in themselves.  I know that we as parents, regardless of how difficult a child can be, must see their true nature.  That when we can hold onto that vision we have for them, they will see that vision for themselves...it may take years, decades, a lifetime, but it will eventually happen.